Day 39—Good Friday, April 3

John 19:25-30

Meanwhile, standing near the cross of Jesus were his mother, and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple whom he loved standing beside her, he said to his mother, “Woman, here is your son.” Then he said to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” And from that hour the disciple took her into his own home.

After this, when Jesus knew that all was now finished, he said (in order to fulfill the scripture), “I am thirsty.” A jar full of sour wine was standing there. So they put a sponge full of the wine on a branch of hyssop and held it to his mouth. When Jesus had received the wine, he said, “It is finished.” Then he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.

Jesus says, “come and follow me,” to his disciples as he plucks them up and out from their ordinary routines as fishermen. Jesus doesn’t tell them where they are headed – at least not in the beginning. As time goes on, Jesus fills them in, and they resist believing him. The disciples deny the ending Jesus talks about all the way until the remaining few stand below the foot of the cross as Jesus says, “it is finished.”

We, who read, study, and live out the Gospel two millennium later, know that the commandment “come and follow me” means all the way to the immeasurable pain, grief, and sorrow, that death brings. If we are honest with ourselves – we can admit that would prefer if following Jesus meant we could avoid all that. Yet, life and discipleship simply do not work that way. For Jesus is always found in the places of the world where there is great heartache and sorrow, continually inviting us to draw nearer to the pain of the world rather than to look away.

But Jesus does not just lead us to these places and abandon us in our grief. He tells his mother, here is your son, pointing out the disciple he loves. To the disciple, he says, “here is your mother.” Those who will grieve are not left on their own – they are given one another to walk through the aftershock with.

When you feel your resistance to following where Jesus is leading kicking in – know you’re not the first disciple to feel this way – and remember that Jesus does not lead us anywhere by ourselves. Jesus is always leading us towards one another. Jesus’ final act is one of love – giving us one another to walk the road of heartache together – until we see the promises of the resurrection together.

-The Rev. Isabella Fagiani